(To the anon who asked about this a long long time ago.. here it is, sorry it took FOREVER) To make things easier i’ll divide my life up into parts elementary, high school, college :P
I grew up in a Christian family, my parents were both missionaries—-so i basically grew up with Christian values. Even if I grew up in such a setting I was not a perfect child. Growing up my mom taught us to pursue excellence always. But somehow i grew to be too competitive.
I was never the best, there was always that girl who was better than me. People loved her, and i even lost my best friend to her. I remember my 6 year best friend even told me “You know what Dorothy, I never really thought of you as a best friend.” I grew with resentment and hatred in my heart towards “miss popular”, and i was scared from a broken best friend relationship.
Determined NOT to be 2nd best, I did all i could to noticed and on top of the class. I joined various organizations, i studied hard—-and yes i got what I wanted. Teacher’s loved me, I became miss popular in school, but I was STILL 2nd best. Out of my frustration i decided to cheat in 2nd year (which my closest friends confronted me about, and which i stopped doing eventually.) Out of desperation to get good grades i began to take my health for granted. I developed ulcer and passed out 2x in school because of the heart burn.
In high school I had my heart broken by various best friends (female). It was as if anyone who became my best friend would either leave me, or backstab me.
Oh and in the end I graduated Salutatorian. But i praise God for that now :)
I wanted to start a new leaf—-live the Christian life PROPERLY.
College shook me however. It didn’t matter how good I was in High School, in college I was a nobody. Getting into my dream university meant being classmates with some of the smartest students in the Philippines. From being a math whiz in high school i suddenly found myself flunking my calculus. College was crazy and it had a lot of adventures… and that i will have to put in another story.
In college I became depressed a lot, i would often times contemplate suicide because of my academics. Back then I wanted to shift courses but my parents hadn’t given their blessing so I was frustrated and thought death was the only solution out of my rut.
And yes, I had another best friend. This time she was a Christian.. but when she back slid she began saying hurtful stuff. In the end i just didn’t want to have a best friend anymore.
It was in college that I moved to a new church (since i came from the province and moved to the city.) It was at a youth retreat that I got to meet Christian friends, who little to my knowledge, would one day play an important role in my Christian walk.
Here at this camp i met my current discipler. It was here also that I understood the importance of having a discipleship group. It was here that I really grew.
In Church i joined the music ministry. I joined because I knew I was a good singer—-(yes I was a very proud person) but eventually through the ministry God just gave me a heart that was willing to be humble. It’s one of those things you know God just helps you deal with. Eventually God called me to be a worship leader, and it was at the time i didn’t want to because i was scared of falling into the trap of pride. But God is faithful and ever since the day i began worship leading God would always cause circumstances to REMIND me to be TOTALLY DEPENDENT on Him :)
Soon I began handling my own disciples, and the Lord has added to the numbers :)
I am a work in progress. And i have a LOT of refining to do.
From pride to humility, from broken relationships to stepping out in faith to build relationships, from depression and self-inflicting tendencies to finding joy and hope in the Lord, from a cheater to a woman who seeks integrity, from a people pleasing person to a God pleasing follower.
God is still writing my story. But this is His promise to me that I claim :) And this is my life verse. Being confident that He who began a good work in me IS faithful to finish it to completion til the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)
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